Rest in Bacon? - Bacon Worship Has Officially Jumped the Coffin

"Everything Should Taste Like Bacon", Even Death
Bacon coffin (J&D / March 29, 2012)
From J&D's foods, the makers of an entire line of Bacon-flavored (and, ironically, Kosher certified)  products such as Bacon Salt, Baconnaise, and Bacon Pop, we now a final resting place designed for the uber bacon lover, the Bacon Coffin.

When I first heard about this "bacon and pork" painted, $2,999.95, casket (complete with a bacon-scented air freshener) I couldn't help but think, that the cult of bacon had finally gone too far.  I quickly realized, however, that they hadn't gone far enough.

First, the recently deceased should be dressed appropriately.  This means a bacon hat, bacon shirt, bacon tie, bacon pants, and even bacon shoes.

Bacon Shoes via Geekology.com

As traditional flowers would be inappropriate for such a ceremony, numerous bacon bouquets will have to be prepared.

Image via FastCompany.com 

Third, the coffin itself be made of real bacon, woven into in a lattice-like structure (like the bacon meatza crust). Or, better yet, ditch the coffin concept entirely.  Sub it out for an entire cured pig, a hollowed out Hog-zilla, Applewood smoked and seasoned to perfection.

Picture copyright 2004 Chris Griffin

Finally, the bacon coffin shouldn't be buried, but interred rather, in a meat mausoleum built with bricks of bacon.

Photo via AhtSeriousEats.com

Then, and only then, will the corpse in question be able to RIB (rest in bacon).

Chime in on the baconification of, well, everything in the comments section below!
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About Tony Fed

Tony is the host of the Paleo Magazine Radio podcast, author of "Paleo Grilling: A Modern Caveman's Guide to Cooking with Fire", and Cofounder of Powerful PT, an innovative information resource for Fitness Professionals. He has appeared on numerous local and national television and radio broadcasts and regularly hosts healthy cooking workshops and informational lectures. He is also a full-time Personal Trainer and Wellness Consultant who lives in Jacksonville Florida with his wife Jamie.
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